I use a lot of iPhone Apps, but my absolute favorite is the free Pirate Insult Generator by Pirate Monkeyness.
This App creates insulting pirate tirades by randomly selecting threats, insults, adjectives, nouns, and exclamations from a variety of lists. Their website claims it can create nearly eight million unique insults to hurl during a heated swordfight to strike fear into the heart of your enemy, or just to confuse and/or impress your friends. Examples of the awesomeness are as follows:
“I’ll reduce your ship to rubble, ye barnacle-covered, mutinous swabble… Hoist the Jolly Roger!”
And the classic…
“I’ll skewer yer gizzard, ye nattering, foul-smellin’ hornswaggler… Scupper that!”
My favorite part is that while they are powerful insults, they are still family-friendly. That is if your family does not suffer from low self-esteem.
This app will soon include a greatly anticipated pirate translator that changes boring English into salty pirate-speak before your eyes. A dictionary of nearly 500 words and phrases will be used, not counting variations on verb tense and plurality, making this translator one of the most comprehensive pirate translators in the world. There will also be an option to e-mail the insults to your friends for even more fun.
The App is currently available for iPhone. Be sure to get it in time for International Talk-Like-A-Pirate-Day (September 19)! Check it out or else….“I’ll use your pegleg for firewood, ye lily-livered sea bass!
